‘The seed of a sexual encounter always produces the fruit of long suffering.’
I’m almost certain I was just about 13 years old when I heard Karen’s mum say this to us girls. Karen’s family was the Jesus kind. It’s weird to say that because my family was also the church going kind of folk.
Our clan was different though. My parents believed in freewill. God gave it to us and they were certain He expected us to utilize it. Our brains weren’t put between our ears for nothing.
Stevie who’s my older brother and I just winged through each phase doing whatever appealed to us using freewill to justify our desires.
Needless to say, when I turned sixteen it just felt like the age to go a step further with boys. Stevie told me it wasn’t all that cause of course he had been there and seen it but I stuck my tongue at him, “Whatever bro. You’ve had your own experience. It’s time I explore.”
Stevie shot daggers at me with his eyes but that was customary. Older brothers generally thought they knew it all. Mine was four years older so go figure.
I started to accept dates and be out long hours. My parents had too much going for them and they just wanted us to be happy and told us as much.
One night I was out with Dan, our quarterback at school. We rode for miles and I kept asking where we were off to but he would smile slyly and say, “I’m about to show you a good time babe.”
At first I was flattered because every girl in school wanted to be me. Who wouldn’t be flattered to get noticed by Dan, the hottest guy in school.
However the further we went, the more anxious I became. Of course I wanted to be Dan’s girl. He had made it clear he didn’t date babies. He wanted everything. I thought I wanted that too; I thought I was ready but suddenly I wasn’t so sure.
Without intending to, Stevie’s words came back to me, “I’ve been through this Sammy. It’s not all that.” It was a roller coaster; I couldn’t get past the cold feeling when I remembered the words of Karen’s mum, “A sexual encounter will always produce the fruit of long suffering.”
“Turn around Dan.” I whispered.
He looked at me like I was crazy, “What? We’re almost there babe.”
“Turn around Dan. I don’t want to go anymore.” I said a little more forcefully.
“Don’t be a baby. We’re almost there.” Dan increased his speed.
I turned hysterical and grabbed his arm, “Stop the car.” I screamed.
He hit the brakes, turned to me and slapped me. “You shut the hell up and keep still. We’ll be there soon.”
Like clouds clearing, it hit me with sudden clarity. Something was very wrong and after tonight, it would never be the same. Of their own accord my mind reeled back to Ella, Susan and Yasmine. They were Dan‘s ex at some point. Only one thing was constant about all three. A few weeks after saying yes to Dan, they each transferred to other schools. It was a joke that went on in the school halls but tonight Sammy had a feeling she was about to find out why.